Tinder taglines deciphered

Tinder. Once a taboo and now still actively used by singles. Admit it! Being single (in Dubai) means either finding a date in a club (fat chance of finding a normal guy) or using Happn, Bumble, or Tinder (0.001% chance, meaning you have to go through 100 profiles before you find a reasonably normal one. Only to find out he is a tourist).

Cringeworthy as it is, it’s also fun and my friends and I even have an app where we share all the amazing ‘fish in the sea’ in Dubai. Including guys with selfies with a big fish.

Strolling through the profiles, I’ve deciphered many of them and boiled the taglines down to their actual meaning:

Tinder tagline	True meaning
Self-employed	Unemployed
Director/owner/boss	Needs to overcompensate for something
Looking for friends	Doesn’t feel guilty about playing multiple women “because I told her in advance I only wanted to be friends!”
World traveller, have lived in many places	Has a fear of commitment and can’t stay in one place for too long
New to Dubai!	NO relationship material as he will spend the first year actively hooking up
Love life	Has no idea what he’s doing in life, little ambition
Open-minded	Already has 3 wives and is looking for a mistress
Gentleman	Sends a nice text after dumping you, instead of ghosting
Sapiosexual	Is really into stewardesses but won’t admit it
No escorts or hookups please!	Is a pimp himself
Looking for a real girl	Is actually into the fake ones with duckface but doesn’t want his friends to know

You know it’s true! Ladies, the next time you see any of the above taglines, think twice before swiping right 🙂